I usually like the practicality of  Working Mother magazine but, like Real Simple, it seems they have lost their freaking mind this month.  One of it’s featured articles asks if us mothers are secretly addicted (softly, it says…I didn’t realize there was a distinction) to caffeine, texting and food? Um, I would have to answer yes, yes, and most definitely yes!  I guess I’m a functioning addict. Hey, Tom Sizemore, give me a ring, we can dish.

One woman discusses how she eats an entire bowl of M&Ms without even realizing it. Yikes, that’s my Tuesday. And another woman describes how her husband had to “pull the plug on her online activities” after she started a blog! OMG, I’m surprised the show Intervention didn’t need to step in! If my spouse took away my laptop, let’s just say that all those forensic books I read as research for my mystery book series would come in to actual practice.

They even have an on-hand PhD to add weight to this “epidemic,” Dr. Cassandra Vieten says “It’s basically the reward system [in our brain] gone haywire.” And here I was under the misunderstanding that this was just how I de-stress or reach out. Wow! What is a girl to do? And this is precisely my problem: “girl”: that’s how I feel I’m being treated. How about 3 pages about getting my picky 2 year old to eat actual food items, or a spread on mommy group etiquette…you know useful stuff. All this story did was reinforce my belief that most of the world — a majority of women included — think that, regardless of the sexual revolution, the fairer sex is still unable to function as actual adults!

I realize I don’t have a PhD with which to hit Dr. Vieten over the head but I can say that as a woman and a working mom I like my “little” vices. I enjoy watching crap tv to decompress, I like eating an entire bag of cookies and I do REALLY REALLY love blogging, and I have NO plans to give up any of them. Oh, and you can include my morning coffee and afternoon tea to that list too. Frankly, I think all of these actions can be seen as coping with LIFE. I’m not saying that one should consume 3000 calories a day or ignore your hygiene because you’re online but none of the women interviewed seemed to have been doing that either.

So this month, may I suggest, picking up an issue of Mental Floss magazine and using those precious moments of reading to enjoy their awesome articles, such as: “10 Prostitutes Who Altered The Fate Of The Universe,” or “10 Provocative Questions About Raising Chickens.” And perhaps in May Working Mother will be back to its usual sensible self.